It's been a long time...

This has been a long time coming, so it is no surprise that at the moment, I can consider myself single. I know that it is right, and I made the correct decision for myself, but sometimes I wish it can be different. It did not bother me as much during my work week since I was so busy, but over the course of this lazy weekend, numerous times I've been caught thinking about the good times, rather than the reasons that the relationship has stalled.

But there is a part of me that is excited for what is to come. Although I know I'm a long way away from marriage and kids, that doesn't stop me from being excited about being with someone who has the same desire to discuss the future, rather than pretend it doesn't exist.

I'm relieved to put everything from my past behind me and to focus on the future. Start the summer off with a clean slate.

I'm excited to experience the butterflies of meeting a new person that stands out from anyone else. I'm excited for the flirtatious texts, and the first time going to dinner and a movie. I'm excited for the moment right before our first kiss, and the hours afterwards that I will spend recounting it.

I'm excited for the night that we decide this relationship is something special and we want to make it "official." I'm excited for the cuddle sessions, the first night sleeping over, the night when he meets my friends, the nights where we drink too much and dance to pounding rap music at a club, the first time I let him drive my car.

I'm excited for the time when "I really really like you" becomes "I love you."

Obviously I am a long time away from this happening, since I don't even have a potential guy in my life. But, my father once told me that you know you're ready for a real relationship when you can say what you DO want in a relationship, rather than just what you DON'T want. And I'm finally at that point.

But until that guy walks into my life, I will enjoy the amount of time I can spend with my friends and family. And I will have a blast enjoying every moment of my life, rather than wishing for something that I know will not be.